How to make your inner realm a peaceful place

The world has gone haywire and you either have no command or have very little power to change it. After reaching a certain point in life, you realize you have no control over the external world. But, among the labyrinth of reasonings, you have the power to control your inner world and build a pleasant, quiet, tranquil world for yourself.

Miracle has happened to people who have practiced self-control and self-possession. You probably already know the answer to this question but let me ask you this again just to let your mind ponder on it a bit more.

Do you think you can control other people behaviors?

No, Of course not.

You have no control over circumstances, people, their behaviors or attitude but, do you realize that you have the choice to control your own thoughts? You can select every single thought that pops up in your mind.

In fact, you must be thinking something at this moment right! Stop and ask yourself, is this a waste thought and draining the energy out of you or are you getting the positive vibe out of it?

Mastering your thoughts need practice but first, you need to unlearn some of your deeply rooted habits. You will need to stop looking for the answer to these questions right away because you will realize soon how frequently these questions arise in your mind every day and extract most of your energy.

How can they do this ??

Many of us have asked this question probably 100th times in our life. How could they do this inconceivable, unimaginable, highly immoral act? The point is they have done it, they can do it and they will keep doing it all the time, and you are not going to stop them from doing what they think is absolutely right.

Your definition of righteousness may not match with others. It’s you who has defined the boundaries for unacceptable things. And no one cares what definition do you have for certain terms. People will act the way they think is right and they will do it without realization because that’s how they have been nourished and fostered in their lives. Their actions and their decisions may offend you but it is very subtle to understand that they are fair in their position.

I have learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different — Anonymous

By contemplating over other’s action you are not just killing your time and energy but also limiting your focus. Focus on what is needed to be done to get things right and keep yourself under control. Chances are that it is going to work both ways. By focussing on your inner strength, you have not transmitted despicable energy towards others and you have also taken control of the situation. This will empower you and others at the same time.


How can they not understand me?

Don’t try to explain yourself to people. If they don’t get you, they don’t get you. Simple.

My mother finds it difficult to understand my father even after 35 years of their marriage. The truth is, you can never fully understand a person and neither you can expect others to understand you painstakingly.

As harsh as it may sound no one is capable of mirroring your mind and soul.

Many people will come in your life and few of them might find you incomprehensible. If they matter to you, make little effort by yourself to help them understand you better and stop begging everyone to understand you because

People only understand from their level of perception.

Here is A beautiful piece if writing on understanding.

Rather that trying to woo everyone, by convincing, that they have mistaken you, just focus on being yourself. You have to learn to value yourself and be in love with yourself. Once you learn this, believe me, you will never be concerned about what others think of you.

How could they even think of me like that?

Yes, They will think a lot more or sometimes a way less about you. They might think anything they like and you can’t stop them. It doesn’t always have to do with you. Sometimes people will think less of you because that makes them feel better about themselves. It has nothing to do with you or your character. What other people think of you is none of your business. You have to grasp that people who criticize you secretly want to be like you.

You can’t control the outer world the only thing that is in your hand, is your own mind. It doesn’t matter what other think of you but it does matter what you think of yourselves. Your self-image should be honest. Listen to everyone what they have to say but allow no one to enter your restful kingdom. Believe in yourself.

The only person you should try to be better than, is the person you were yesterday

Consider this, what would happen if you die tomorrow?

Just about hundreds of lives will come to know that you have ceased to live. Chances are that, eighty out of them will move on with their lives in next couple of days. Ten out of those twenty will mourn and talk about you little longer but eventually accelerate.

Rest ten people, which we call our inner circle, is gonna miss you real long. Love those ten people and care for them without expecting anything in return because they love you unconditionally. Other than your inner circle rest others are only temporary people in your life. They are in your life to play their role which is crucial. But, do not let yourself drift from who you are by other’s perception.

How could they ditch me?

When people are insecure and afraid they can do anything without consciously being aware of their action. People you think you are closed to may dupe you at the time of crisis. Your friends can turn against you. You can be cheated in your relationship, to say the least. The point is absolutely anyone can turn deceitful at any point of your life.

When you have broken heart, make an art. — Meryl Streep

But, can you blame them?

Well, It’s hard to vocalize.

But, let’s focus on what options do you have at hand.

Firstly, you have to minimize your expectations from others. Expectation keeps your affair healthy but too much expectation can destroy any relation. It is less likely for you to feel cheated if you expect less. Going beyond expectations will make you feel liberated and fulfilled.

Uncertainty can turn anyone into a monster but you have to empower yourself and imbibe this knowledge that your expectations might hurt you.

Expect nothing and you will never be disappointed.

Conclusion

You have no control over the events happening in the outer world but, you can still keep your inner world undisturbed and in harmony, by understanding the deep concept of empowering self through changing the thought process. Your peace of mind is in your hand and you can have full control of it.

If we are meeting for the first time, I am Shimpy, just an another novice writer.

Cheers!!!

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If mediocrity haunts you, embrace these changes

Most of us are seeking way to change our lives but somehow we fall in the trap of mundanities. It doesn’t take sweat and blood to stand out from the crowd. Small change in one’s attitude can bring hell lot of differences.

  • Letting go of negative energy

Umpteen forms of energies surround us. Draining energies like jealousy, hatred, anger and resentment leaves us discontented. On the other hand, a moment of happiness, gratitude and appreciation has power to uplift you instantly. Those, who have ability to screen the negative energies, are often identified as unique and remarkably strong people. They choose to embrace positivity, which makes their lives different from others. Do not allow gloomy waves to sweep you aside. Give way to the positive energies because it is very easy to get unsettled by disturbing ideas. Train your mind to be the master of your own thoughts and pick every single response. This practice has helped many to lay foundation of great life.

  • Stop riding in haste

Great people do not show any sign of urgency. They think of long lasting success and focus on sustainable growth. Their planning is meticulous and they walk in your own pace. They know success is not a destination but a beautiful journey. Many of us fail to notice small beauty of life because we are busy making our future. What if, we stop, and appreciate the diversity and richness of nature around us? Reward yourselves for small achievements. Laugh away, when uncertainty is rising. Remember, today is a gift and that is why they called it present. Make it worth living because at one’s deathbed, no one remembers how much money they made or how many hours they spent working.

“The hurrier I go, the behinder I get.”

  • Be self-assured

Self-assurance means having faith in own abilities and it is extremely captivating. It indicates that you are confident and reliable. Be assured of your own persona. You have to first like yourselves in order for others to like you. Your self worth is far more important. Best people never compare themselves with others and always try to be the best version of them. Focus on self-improvement and it will take you along the path of glory.

“Nothing can dim the light which shines from within.”

  • Build trust

Your credibility makes you elegant. When someone trusts you with his or her secret, bury it inside. Credibility, once lost, is very hard to gain. Be the man of your word. Be trustworthy. If you want to stay relevant, stop wasting time in petty gossips and complain, instead, invest your time in healthy deep conversation that will leave meaningful insight to life. If you can’t fulfill your promises, do not make them. Trustworthy people are very rare and one that is rare is always beautiful.

“It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to ruin it.”

  • Value people

Only a great leader can understand the value of celebrating people. It is said that one should surround them with great companies but what if, we learn a bit of something from everyone. Imagine how enriching our experience can get, if we encapsulate diversity. Everyone is good at something and one who understands this is the true legend. Do not be opinionated, if you want to make this world a better place.

Rising from mediocrity to relevance is just few thoughts away.

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Dream big, Start small

Last year I made resolution to achieve certain things in my life, however small for others but very crucial for myself. And I feel so contended by the end of the year that my goals, for first three month of the next year, is already on the wall. Now, it has become absolutely clear to my mind that nothing in this world is unachievable. You have the liberty to define your dreams and goals. You have the power to mold your path. You can also achieve what you desire. So here are the five small methods that have ability to change the course of your life.

  • Put them on wall

Nothing is as powerful as those tiny sticky notes on your wall. You are planning to travel to a new city this weekend, put that on your wall. Are you trying to develop new skill? Are you trying to move on from an unhealthy and bad relationship? Are you trying to be a morning person or trying to shed some calories?  Whatever it is just put your goals on the wall absolutely lucid. You will notice them, while going to bed and while waking up. At times, you will just keep looking at them and fall asleep. You have to live and breathe your goals and for that your goals have to be tightly wired in your brain cerebellum. You will be forcefully reminded of your goals every time you feel diverted or lost. So write your goals and stick it to the wall.

  • Take one step at a time

Most of us become overwhelmed while defining our goals and tend to set unrealistic goals which begin to scare ourselves over time. To achieve big, start with small steps. You want to build your morning rituals then don’t set your alarm for 4.00 A.M in the morning one fine day because you were highly motivated. Let’s first try waking up at 7.00 a.m. in the morning. Once you start waking up at 7.00 a.m effortlessly, change your alarm time to 6.45 a.m. small move but highly effective.

Do you want to start reading books? Start reading for 10-15 minutes a day. Make sure that in those fifteen minutes you do nothing but practice reading. Practice this habit and you will find yourself extending your reading time. Set realistic goals and start with small step that’s the key.

  • Persistent

Now this part becomes challenging and test your patience. You have put your goals on the wall and you started executing them gradually but keep your actions persistent. You will feel like you are not making any progress but do it anyway. You will feel like giving up but don’t give up. Be stupid and be tough on yourself. Remember there is nothing like overnight success. You just have to keep doing without thinking of the outcomes. Jennifer Dewalt, a self-taught web developer, learned coding by building 180 websites in 180 days. Practice has power to bring tremendous results so be consistent with your actions.

  • Don’t be afraid to start

No. Wait. You know what it’s okay to be afraid. Everybody gets afraid before starting unexplored path and it’s completely natural. Your brain will explode with fearful and dreary thoughts but don’t let them overcome you instead overcome your fears and believe me once you see the results you will be crushing your fears all the time. You will be addicted to the fearless life.

  • Self-discipline

Sounds pretty tough isn’t it? But all the charismatic leaders, I have read about, if they all had one thing in common then that was developing self-discipline. If you want to shed some kg’s occasional Pizza’s and carbonated drinks are of no excuse. You have to be completely into your goals. You don’t have to explicitly develop self-discipline. Self-discipline itself is an outcome of being persistent and honest about your goals.

“Believe in your dreams. If you don’t, who will?”

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These 5 words can change your life

  1. Give

Joy of giving is unmatchable. The entire world is busy in taking and taking as much as they can. We human beings are afraid and insecure. Nothing satisfies us. We want swanky clothes, luxurious house, expensive watches and list just goes on. We are fearful and only a fearless person can practice giving. Happiness that comes along when you become a giver is incredible. You would want to give more…….

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Some of the best lessons that life has taught me

I am going to turn 24 at the end of this year. I am no teacher I am just a girl next door. Few life lessons that life has taught me so far.

1. I am no body to judge you.

Life has taught me not to judge any one around me. There was a time when I used to listen things and come to a judgment and sometimes I did not even listen and already made conclusion in my mind……..

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10 things that everyone should do daily

10 things that I believe everyone should do daily to make their life better.

  • Do 15-20 minutes (minimum) of physical activity daily. It can be any form of exercise. If you are an early riser, you can go for morning walk, do few squats, jumping jacks and rope skipping. Avoid using vehicles to go to work, walk if you can. Do not sit in one position for more than 1 hour. You can go down and climb up your office stairs in intervals, do some stretches while you are at office……..

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That moment from school

There was a time when my family’s financial condition wasn’t very well.  My parents barely managed our studies. We were five and I was second youngest. I studied in a Hindi medium convent girl’s school always dreamt to get admission in an English medium school. I was very sincere and disciplined girl in my school and that made me school leader who used to manage prayers, speeches, guest welcome and everything else that happens in high schools (already nostalgic)……….

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